1.Man City are expected to win the race to sign Wayne Rooney after offering him 230 Grans a week.
2.Saw a picture of Wayne Rooney's kid in The Sun today. Anyone else think he looked a bit like John Terry?
3.Apparently Wayne Rooney was deprived as a child. Of oxygen by the looks of it.
4.Why did Wayne Rooney cross the ball? Because he's too thick to sign his own name.
5. Wayne Rooney is pleased to announce that he's signed up for a five book deal.........That's an awful lot of crayons he's gonna get through.
6.What have Alex Ferguson and a prostitute got in common? They both have to pull Wayne Rooney off after a poor performance.
7.Sports Latest - Doctors have just confirmed that Wayne Rooney's hair transplant has rejected his face.
8.Wayne Rooney's video game out now: Pre-Evolution Soccer.
9. Wayne Rooney - "United have won so many trophies I can't count." He's missing a full stop after trophies there.
10.Just seen that Wayne Rooney has spent £1200 on a hooker. Thats about 1% of his weekly wage. Would hate to see what I'd get for 1% of my wages.
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